THIS TIME OF YEAR

Around this time every year I start to feel a little funny about the industry that I’ve found myself contributing to – fashion month comes around, and always seems to encourage the same feelings of inadequacy. Just a disclaimer, this won’t be one of those posts slagging of fashion week and those that choose to attend, but I thought it might be interesting to explore the way I feel, as I’m sure I won’t be alone. There’s something about fashion week that feels very elite and vacuous from the outside, but at the same time, I adore seeing glimpses of my favourite designers via the likes of Instagram stories. It’s this love/hate relationship with the fashion industry that always leaves me with the same internal conflict – why am I not making more effort to go to fashion week?…

It’s not that I don’t appreciate the art and craftsmanship that goes on behind the scenes, it’s not that I don’t love clothes, it’s just this general feeling of not feeling like I’d fit in. Which is crazy, because I run a blog where I talk about a whole realm of things – including my relationship with clothes. I guess it stems back to feelings I’ve had throughout school – like I’m not quite part of the cool girl pack, or that my outfits might not be eye catching enough. Which is at the top of the stupid things to worry about list thing considering the idea of being ‘papped’ at one of these events makes me want to crawl inside a deep dark hole.

I guess every year it’s a reminder that a large part of my personality can be quite introvert, and fashion week seems to embody everything that makes me largely uncomfortable. Big crowds of people, lots of cameras, and a whole host of designers that I’ve probably been pronouncing wrong for years…

It’s silly, and I do hope to experience fashion week at some point during my life – like I said, this isn’t be having a moan at fashion week. For now, I’m quite content with admiring fashion week from a place that makes me feel comfortable. There’s always this internal guilt that I’m not doing enough as a blogger/general lover of fashion, but I’ve realised that actually, my purpose with this blog was never to have the best designer bags or the most extensive industry knowledge – it was simply to share and connect… 

Perhaps that’s why big fashion events in general feel intimidating to me – I get struck with imposter syndrome and it makes me reevaluate my career and the work that I do. Fashion is fun, and I’m sure fashion week has the capacity to be too – after all, it’s the people that you choose to go along with that have the power to make these experiences special. I’ve come to the conclusion that my issues surrounding fashion week probably aren’t to do with fashion week at all, and a lot more to do with my own insecurities…

 I grew up in a small village and would cut clothes up from my little box bedroom and dream of being able to invest in the pieces that I really wanted one day. Everyone experiences things differently – style doesn’t have to be fancy events and runways to be validated in some way…

This fashion week, I’m heading to Tuscany for a well overdue trip with my mum. Another year, another fashion week that I haven’t quite managed to get to, but it definitely doesn’t feel like a case of missing out. Where possible, it’s nice to take a step away from how quickly everything moves, and just spend some time where it’s quiet with the people that I love… 


Photographs by Catherine Booty 

Blazer – Beyond retro

T-shirt – Free People

Skirt – Massimo Duti

Boots – Missta

Bag – A.P.C (also here)

Earrings – Rock N Rose

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5 Comments

  1. Just wanted to say I enjoy reading your blog, keeping up with your Insta and also look forward to more YouTube videos. You are a breath of fresh air and I’m happy I got to discover you.

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